Do NOT Follow Your Heart

Everywhere I turn I keep hearing the phrase “just follow your heart," and lately it just makes me absolutely cringe.  On television, in the movies, or in real life, this phrase continues to be used as so-called advice to someone who is unsure about a major decision in their life.  Many times the decision is about a relationship, but it does not necessarily have to be.   Maybe the decision is about the purchase of a new home, or what college you will attend.  More commonly though, it will have something to do with entering into a relationship or a new phase of a relationship.    I know this may not be the popular thing to say, but I would suggest NOT to follow your heart.  You might ask why I would say this.  Well, I simply believe that our heart is very capable of deceiving us and cannot be fully trusted.  Beyond that, when someone says that they are going to follow their heart, I think they are really saying that they are going to follow their feelings.  I definitely think this is a mistake.  I think we all know that our feelings are very fickle and can change like the wind.  If you are someone who has always followed your feelings and had great success with that, by all means feel free to ignore my two cents worth of advice.
Don’t get me wrong, I am not suggesting that we do not pursue our passions.  In fact, what we are passionate about oftentimes leads us to a more purposeful life.  What I am saying though is that many of our decisions require much more than the simplistic approach of “just follow your heart.”

So what should we do -
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1. Give yourself credit – I think we are all a bit smarter than we give ourselves credit for, and we all have the ability to think rationally and consider all the factors and how they may affect our future. 
2. Journal – Pick up a pen and paper and write.  I think there is great value in getting alone and simply writing things out.  It may sound a bit old school, but I think it would be wise to take the time and write out all the pro’s and con’s.
3. Seek advice – Talking with some trusted friends or picking the brain of someone who has been in your situation before can be helpful.  Consider working with a Life Coach who may bring about greater clarity and that “aha moment” that you are looking for.
4. Consider your passions – Yes, I absolutely concede that what we are passionate about should be of great consideration when making important decisions.  We were all created with unique dreams and purposes, so by all means seek these out.  I believe this to be much different than simply “following your heart.”
5. Have a clear understanding of your values – When we know exactly what our core values are, we can have confidence with our decision making because they are the foundational beliefs that anchor our lives and clearly define our identities.

  
                                       Comments are highly appreciated

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